Welcome to another blog post by carer activist Matthew McKenzie, author and also poet raising awareness of unpaid carers. This blog post is on how those caring for someone living with mental ill health can combat Trauma.

If you want to watch the more detailed video version, please click below (33 mins).

For this blog, you can learn essential techniques to recognize, address, and overcome trauma as an unpaid carer. Discover the importance of self-care, setting boundaries, seeking professional support, and building resilience 

Understanding Trauma for Carers

Being a carer can be an overwhelming experience, particularly when faced with the unexpected challenges that come with supporting loved ones who have mental ill health. The role is demanding and often can be thankless, which increases the likelihood of experiencing trauma. In this comprehensive article, we will explore ways to tackle trauma, ensuring that carers have the tools and resources needed to support both their loved ones and themselves.

What is Trauma?

Trauma is an emotional response to a deeply distressing or disturbing event. It can be a single event or a series of events that an individual finds overwhelming, resulting in lasting psychological harm. For carers, particularly those caring for individuals with mental ill health, trauma can significantly impact their sense of safety, self-worth, and emotional regulation. Recognizing trauma and understanding its triggers is critical for managing it effectively.

Acknowledging Your Own Trauma and Its Triggers

The first step in managing trauma is acknowledging it. This can be challenging, as many carers focus so intently on the needs of their loved ones that they overlook their own emotional state. Recognizing trauma involves being aware of personal triggers—specific situations, words, or behaviors that cause a trauma response. Personal triggers can vary widely but are often linked to past traumatic experiences.

Identifying Personal Triggers

• Awareness: Start by noting down situations that cause significant emotional distress or changes in mood. It’s important to be honest and thorough.
• Journaling: Maintain a journal where you record daily experiences, focusing on feelings and reactions. Over time, patterns will emerge, helping to identify triggers.
• Self-Validation: Understand that your feelings are valid and significant. Acknowledging your experiences as a carer is pivotal for your emotional health.

Developing Grounding Techniques for Emotional Regulation

Grounding techniques are essential for managing emotional volatility triggered by trauma. These methods help maintain presence and control during stressful moments.

Mindfulness and Breathing Exercises

• Deep Breathing: Practice deep breathing exercises. They are simple but effective in calming the mind and reducing anxiety.
• Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness practices. Focus on the present moment to prevent being overwhelmed by traumatic thoughts.
• Physical Grounding: Use physical grounding techniques like gripping a comforting object or feeling the floor beneath your feet. Physical sensations can help draw you back to the present.

Setting Clear and Compassionate Boundaries

Boundaries are essential for carers to prevent burnout and manage trauma effectively. Setting boundaries ensures that you can continue to care for your loved one without sacrificing your well-being.

Defining Boundaries

• Determine Limits: Clearly define what you can and cannot do. Make these boundaries known to those around you when possible.
• Communicate Needs: When appropriate, communicate your limits to the person you’re caring for and others involved in their care. This helps in developing mutual understanding and respect.
• Regular Reflection: Acknowledge that these boundaries may need to be reassessed and modified according to changing circumstances.

Seeking Professional Support

Professional support can be invaluable in processing trauma and developing coping strategies.

Individual Therapy

Engaging in therapy with a professional can provide a safe space to process trauma. Therapists can offer personalized coping strategies and help build emotional resilience.

Support Groups

Joining support groups for carers can provide validation and comfort. Sharing experiences with others who understand the challenges can be incredibly healing. Check local resources or online directories for carer-specific support groups.

Practicing Compassionate Self-Care Daily

Self-care is crucial in managing ongoing trauma. It involves small daily practices that help maintain emotional balance.

Self-Care Strategies

• Daily Resets: Incorporate small, non-negotiable self-care routines, such as taking walks, journaling, or listening to calming music.
• Mindful Journaling: Use journaling as a tool to track your emotions and identify triggers. Prompts like “Today I felt…” or “I feel supported when…” can guide your reflection.
• Other Techniques: Engage in activities that you enjoy and add to your sense of well-being, like hobbies or spending time in nature.

Developing Skills for Emotional Detachment

Healthy detachment involves caring without absorbing the other person’s emotional turmoil.

Practicing Detachment

• Reflective Techniques: After intense interactions, take a few minutes to separate your own feelings from the other person’s emotions. This clarity protects your emotional state.
• Visualizing Boundaries: During stressful situations, visualize a protective boundary around yourself to prevent being drawn into the turmoil.

Creating a Safety Plan for High-Stress Situations

Safety plans are essential for managing periods of high stress.

Planning Ahead

• Identify Safe Spaces: List safe spaces and people you can turn to when feeling overwhelmed.
• Develop Coping Strategies: Create specific steps for self-soothing and self-care after high-stress situations. This could include deep breathing exercises, hobbies, or speaking with a trusted friend.

Building Resilience and Strength

Recognizing and celebrating your strengths can reinforce resilience and empower you to handle future challenges.

Small Wins

• Celebrate Successes: Acknowledge and celebrate your ability to manage both your trauma and caregiving responsibilities. Even small successes are milestones worth recognizing.
• Set Realistic Expectations: Understand that dealing with trauma is a gradual process. Be compassionate towards yourself and set attainable goals.

Reflect and Reassess Regularly

Regular self-check-ins are necessary to manage trauma effectively.

Reflection Practices

• Self-Check-ins: Frequently assess your emotional state, energy levels, and boundaries. Note any caregiving activities that are particularly triggering.
• Modify as Needed: Based on your reflections, modify your approach to avoid burnout. Delegate tasks if possible, and seek additional support when necessary.

Accept that Healing is Ongoing

Healing from trauma is a long-term process that requires patience and compassion.

Embrace the Journey

• Acknowledge the Time: Understand that trauma is complex and healing takes time. Your journey is unique and equally valuable as the person you are caring for.
• Focus on Progress: Emphasize progress over perfection. Every step towards managing trauma is meaningful, no matter how small it might seem.

Tackling trauma as a carer is not about achieving perfection but about making progress. Every small step towards balancing your trauma with caregiving responsibilities is significant. Remember, you are valid, important, and worthy of support. By prioritizing your well-being, you not only become a better carer but also pave the way for a more sustainable caregiving journey.

Welcome to another blog post by carer activist Matthew McKenzie author of Experiencing mental health caregiving – Unpaid Carers .

This time Matthew explores the complex effects of trauma on caregivers of individuals with mental health issues. Learn about the challenges, stigma, and emotional toll faced by caregivers in providing support and care.

If you want to watch a more detailed version of this lecture, the tune into the video below (over 40 minutes).

Understanding Trauma in Mental Health Caregiving

Mental health caregiving is a complex, multifaceted role that carries a significant emotional burden. When caring for a loved one experiencing mental ill health, caregivers often face a myriad of challenges that can lead to their own forms of trauma. Although the primary focus tends to be on the patient, it’s essential to recognize the psychological impact on those providing care. This article delves into various traumatic experiences caregivers may face and offers insights into understanding and addressing these challenges.

What is Trauma?

Trauma is an emotional response to a stressful or dangerous event, which can cause lasting physical or psychological harm. It significantly affects a person’s sense of safety, self, and ability to regulate emotions. In the context of mental health caregiving, trauma often results from witnessing or experiencing situations that deeply distress the caregiver.

Traumatic Experiences Examples Faced by Caregivers

Witnessing Self-Harm or Suicidal Behavior

One of the most distressing experiences for caregivers is witnessing a loved one engage in self-destructive actions or suicide attempts. This situation can lead to feelings of helplessness, fear, and lasting trauma for the caregiver. The constant worry about their loved one’s safety creates a persistent state of anxiety and hyper-vigilance.

Handling Verbal and Emotional Abuse

Mental illness can sometimes lead to outbursts or challenging behavior, including insults, threats, or emotional manipulation. Over time, these behaviors can wear down the caregiver’s emotional resilience, leading to feelings of vulnerability and trauma. Understanding the difference between a typical family argument and behaviors stemming from mental illness is crucial but often challenging without adequate support and training.

Experiencing Physical Aggression or Violence

Some caregivers face the threat or reality of physical aggression, which can be incredibly traumatic, especially if they fear for their own safety. It’s vital for caregivers to report such instances to professionals to ensure their safety and well-being.

Financial Strain

The cost of care treatments and the possible loss of work can add financial pressure, compounding the stress on caregivers. The financial burden is an additional layer of stress that can lead to trauma, particularly if the situation is ongoing.

Sleep Deprivation

Caring responsibilities can disrupt sleep, especially if the person with mental illness is active at night. Ongoing sleep deprivation leads to exhaustion, which can significantly impair a caregiver’s mental and physical health and lead to trauma over time.

Dealing with Personal Trauma Triggers

Caregivers may have their own trauma histories, which can be exacerbated by the challenges of caregiving. The added stress of caring for someone with mental illness can trigger their own past traumas, compounding the emotional burden they carry.

Feeling Powerless During a Crisis

Watching a loved one suffer, especially over a prolonged period, can create a deep sense of helplessness and trauma for caregivers. The inability to alleviate their loved one’s pain or distress is a profoundly distressing experience.

Navigating Stigma and Judgment

Caregivers often face stigma, blame, or misunderstanding from family, friends, and society. This social judgment can be isolating and discouraging, adding an emotional burden and contributing to feelings of inadequacy or shame.

Managing Resentment and Guilt

Over time, caregivers may feel resentment about their responsibilities, followed by guilt for feeling that way. This emotional cycle can be painful and traumatic, especially in cases of chronic or relapsing mental illness.

Witnessing Cognitive Decline or Personality Changes

Watching a loved one’s cognitive abilities decline or their personality change can feel like a profound loss. This experience of anticipatory grief can be deeply traumatic for caregivers, who mourn the gradual loss of the person their loved one used to be.

Medication and Medical Side Effects

Seeing a loved one deal with the side effects of medication can be both frustrating and traumatic. Caregivers often feel helpless as they witness the physical and mental decline of their loved ones due to treatment side effects.

Encountering Care System Barriers

Navigating the healthcare system, especially when quality mental health care is limited, can be discouraging and traumatic. Advocating for a loved one amidst system barriers and a lack of support is a daunting task that can wear down a caregiver’s emotional resilience.

Feeling Judged by Professionals

Caregivers may feel judged by mental health professionals or society, leading to feelings of inadequacy or shame. This judgment can be particularly hurtful when stemming from professionals who should understand the complexities of mental health caregiving.

Managing Personal Mental Health Struggles

Caregivers may have their own mental health struggles, which can be exacerbated by caregiving responsibilities. This dual burden can lead to burnout, depression, and trauma as they try to manage both their own and their loved one’s mental health.

Facing Reality of a Lifelong Illness

Coming to terms with the chronic nature of a loved one’s mental illness can be traumatic. Caregivers often grieve the future they had imagined and struggle with a deep sense of loss, which can lead to long-term emotional trauma.

Addressing and Combating Trauma in Caregiving

As an extra in this blog, I decided to give some tips on combating trauma, although I will follow tackling trauma in another lecture.

Accessing Support Networks

It’s crucial for caregivers to access support networks, whether through family, friends, or caregiver support groups. Sharing experiences and gaining support from others in similar situations can provide emotional relief and practical advice.

Prioritizing Self-Care

Self-care is essential for caregivers to maintain their own mental health. This includes taking time for oneself, engaging in enjoyable activities, and seeking professional help if needed.

Seeking Professional Help

Therapy or counseling can be invaluable for caregivers dealing with trauma. Professional mental health support can help caregivers process their experiences, develop coping strategies, and reduce the emotional burden.

Education and Training

Educating oneself about mental illness and caregiving strategies can empower caregivers. Understanding the nature of mental illness and learning effective caregiving techniques can help reduce feelings of helplessness and improve caregiving outcomes.

Advocacy and Policy Change

Advocating for better mental health services and policy changes can also be a crucial step. Caregivers can work with organizations and policymakers to improve resources, support systems, and care practices for both patients and caregivers.

Conclusion

The experiences faced by mental health caregivers are multifaceted and can lead to significant trauma. Recognizing the psychological impact on caregivers and addressing their needs is crucial for their well-being. Accessing support, prioritizing self-care, seeking professional help, and advocating for systemic changes are essential steps in managing and reducing caregiver trauma. By focusing on these areas, caregivers can better navigate the complexities of mental health caregiving and maintain their own emotional and psychological health.